武林外传-英文版
本文选自《武林外传》第三十七回：心不甘小郭拼才艺
情不愿无双走天涯
（B代表白展堂，T代表佟湘玉，L代表吕轻侯和大嘴，G代表郭芙蓉，Z代表祝无双）
B: Welcome to today’s program “It’s not possible to know the wonders of travelling life without competition”. It’s better for me to be happy than for you to, and better for me to be satisfied than for you to. We are happy today to have three guests here. Let me introduce them one by one. The first is a great woman, the manager of TongFu Inn.
T: TongFu Inn is always the best place for you.
B: Ok, let me go on to introduce the second guest, Lv Qinghou, the fearless swordsman in Guanzhong.
L: Read more books and read good books. The Funny Version of the Martial World is a good book. When you read it, you will fall ill in bed, not thinking about eating and drinking. If you want it, please contact me in person and sit down with me for a long talk.
B: Sorry, I’ve got to stop you advertising for your book. The last guest is waiting for my introduction. Do you know who is he? He is the only one student of the god of cooking in Beijing, Li Xiulian.
L: Well , just call me “big mouth”. Big mouth Li, male, 27 years old, single, healthy and strong, good-looking, with many good qualities, but without a house for marriage.
B: Now let’s warmly welcome the two contestants. One is Guo Furong, the most powerful woman, and the other is Zhu Wushuang, the super woman complainant. Are you ready to pk?
G: I am ready and what you can do is wait for death.
Z: Just leave what you said for jokes.
B: All right. Let me make clear the rules on the contest. This contest runs on winning three out of five rounds. Now the first round starts.
A: Wipe, wipe and wipe.
B: Ok. The one who wipes the pot clean in shorter tome is the winner. One, two, three, start! Who will be the winner of this round, the hard-working and kind-hearted her or the clever and opportunistic her? You will know the answer after the advertisement. Please don’t leave! Here I am again. You know the two contestants have finished their wiping. Now let’s see who has done better. Welcome the four judges to vote for the winner. Please decide it by throwing coins into their pots.
G: Hey hey hey! (What’s wrong with you)
B: Now let’s welcome the chairman to announce the results.
T: The winner is Zhu Wushuang.
B: Ok, let’s move on to the second round.
A: Wash, wash, and wash!
B: In this round, the one who washes the clothes clean in shorter time wins. It’s time to start! (after some minutes)Now judges, please come over to vote again for the winner.
T: The winner is Zhu Wushuang!(Guo weeping)
B: ( to Guo) What are you feeling about your losing in the two rounds?
G: Just one word, cool! (going over to Lv) Are you satisfied to see them insult me?
L: Next one I will try my best.
B: Now let’s come to the third round.
A: Mop, mop and mop!
G: Starting to take off her clothes
B: (to Guo)What are you doing?
G: I want to take off my clothes to pk her。
B：What I mean is to mop the floor to see who can mop the floor clean first. Start! Now welcome the senior hunter Yan Xiaoliu to tell us the winner.
Y: The winner is…(G)
L: Wait! The floor bricks are used for stepping on not for looking at. The brick Wushuang stepped on has been waxed, so it is slippery and she is easy to fall.
T: The winner of this round is Guo Furong!
B: Zhu Wushuang finally won the contest by two to one. Congratulations!
G: It’s me who has won, not her!
B: You should be modest.
G: But this is unfair.
B: Ok, let’s vote again in a special way to decide the winner. Judges, please go and stand beside the one you support, and who has more supporters is the winner.
B: Now let me annouce the final winner of this contest. The winner is Zhu Wushuang! Congratulations!(Guo becoming angery and starting to throw things)
